Leaving
by WinterElle
Summary: One shot. After years of living together as a couple, tensions build for Elijah and Elena as he finds her wordlessly packing her things. Follow up to Making Amends.


**Author's note: **

**Before you start reading, you should know that this is a rewrite of a story I published a couple of years ago under another pen name. I removed all of my work under that name for my own reasons. If this feels redundant, that might be because it is, aside from some edits here and there. My apologies for any confusion.**

Leaving

The skies were blue and the air peaceful as he watched, but lightning flashed and clouds roiled as a storm brewed in Elijah's heart. His brown eyes had narrowed to slits as he watched her work. Obscured by the line of trees outside his home, he'd been observing for more than an hour as she trudged one box after another out of his home, _their home_, and packed it into the back of her SUV.

He'd played this scene out once before and it had marked a beginning. The day she left for college she'd managed to fit everything she valued into the trunk of her car with all the skill of an engineer. She was doing it again. This time the familiar scene marked an ending. His Elena wasn't going away to college this time, she was just going away…from him.

Thunder rolled in his ears, battering his senses with the sheer volume, a rolling rhythm only he could hear.

He knew it all. He'd even known it was coming, the end of it. It was hard to have lived as many lifetimes as he had and not see the end of a thing from the beginning. The knowledge he had stubbornly ignored now twisted in the wind of his private storm, mocking him. He had disregarded everything, hanging his hopes on her love for him…and her loyalty. His lips twisted like a hangman's noose as he thought of what he'd overlooked in the last weeks.

_Elena will explain_. So he had kept his thoughts to himself, his knowledge tucked away while he waited for her honesty to play itself out. _Trust me_, she said. Betrayal gave that word a knife's edge now that would flay him alive.

She had been meeting someone. He knew because he'd witnessed it with his own eyes. He had followed her when a call had left her scampering away from a quiet evening at home with a half-hearted mumble of an apology. As he had followed her car, he kept telling himself he was being foolish and suspicious. Her car, though, had turned left rather than taking a right that would've led to her editor's office, where she'd said she was going.

Seeing her step into a human man's arms and then into his car a moment later had left him clenching white knuckled fists, but he'd held his peace. It had taken all the self-control he could muster not to follow further, but he had not. Her words of trust and love rang in his ears. There had to be a reasonable explanation, so he waited. He knew now that was his first mistake.

There had been other things. Hushed phone conversations that ended when he entered a room. Meetings that went hours longer than expected.

Out of town for a few days, he had gotten an alert from her bank account about a large withdrawal. He'd only placed the alert to help protect her, not to monitor her. But a nearly five hundred thousand dollar withdrawal had alarmed him. It had taken only a few minutes to trace the exchange and find that she was behind it. A house. She had bought a house on her own. The two of them were supposed to be partners, sharing everything. Or so he had thought.

And now he came home a day early to find her packing her things into her car….again.

There had not been a harsh word exchanged, or a warning of any kind. _She was simply leaving_. And all he could see was that stranger's face she had driven away with when it began. All he needed was a name and he would cheerfully tear the human apart.

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Elena wiped dusty hands on her tattered cut off denim shorts and pushed her ponytail back over her shoulder. Her disheveled reflection laughed at her in the bathroom mirror. She was a mess, both literally and figuratively.

Elijah was gone out west for some trip, some unavoidable business, he had said. She was always a wreck when he wasn't home, but she never said that, or let him see. The last thing she wanted to be to him was a clinging female.

So rather than sit and feel sorry for herself, which was exactly what she'd done for the first day he was gone, now she was gathering, packing and cleaning. Keeping her hands busy made the time go faster. Carrying another set of curtains her mother had made from the linen closet attached to their bathroom, Elena made her way to the bedroom to press them carefully into the box on the bed. A muffled step on the thick carpet made her freeze, thinking of the fact that she was all alone here.

Spinning quickly, rather than finding an intruder, she found Elijah leaning casually against the door frame.

"Oh," She put a hand to her thumping heart, laughing at herself. Even after several years together, she still wasn't used to how quietly and quickly he could move when he wanted to.

"I didn't expect you until tomorrow." She smiled, thrilled to see him, but he didn't return her warmth. His eyes were hard and cold.

"Clearly." The word was tight and clipped, quiet fury leaking out around the edges.

"I…I don't understand."

"You didn't have to hide this, Elena." He closed his eyes for a moment, the grooves in his cheeks somehow more pronounced in the light. "I expected this from the beginning. We could have talked. I just hoped we would have more…." His words trailed off, unable to go on, his throat closing around the pain.

"More what, Elijah?" She had no idea what he was talking about.

"Don't mock me!" It was a roar, ferocious. He took a deep, slow breath and finished his thought. "I had hoped for more time."

"But…" Elena had no idea what was happening. He wasn't making sense and everything seemed to be degenerating to a fight. They hardly ever fought, as rule.

A furious hand sliced through the air in a gesture for silence. "I know that you withdrew a sizeable portion of your bank account."

_He monitored her bank account?_ "Yes. That's true."

"With it, you bought a home in Westchester. It is a four bedroom Tudor with an attached garage." The statement took on a casual tone, as if they were discussing a neighbor over their morning coffee. He cocked his head to one side, waiting for her to deny it.

"You always say that real estate is a good investment." Yes, that was a dodge. She could admit that to herself. Discussing the purchase wasn't something she was prepared to do yet. But why was he so angry?

"Stop!" The roar again. "Don't lie to me anymore, Elena, please."

_Anymore?_ They stared at one another across their bed, looking ready to circle and do battle. She was angry now too.

_So she was a liar? If she had lied, it had been mostly by omission, and something she felt she had to do. So she didn't tell him absolutely everything. There were things he didn't share. He was no different._

"Honestly," she sneered back at him, "I don't see why you should be monitoring my bank accounts. What business is it of yours if I decide to spend some of my money?" Writing horror novels paid very well, so why shouldn't she do what she wanted with her bank account? He wouldn't let her contribute to their living expenses or anything else for that matter.

Yes, it was just his way, to care for her by providing. She could love him for that, even respect him. Asking him to change would be like expecting him to become someone else. But she didn't need a keeper. _She was a grown woman for God's sake. _But he cut through her building temper with the next statement. The accusation came from out of nowhere as far as she could see.

"It has everything to do with me when your leaving, damn it!" A hand shot out and one of the boxes on the bed struck the far wall close to the ceiling in a spurt of unexpected fury. Heart in her throat, she stilled to watch him warily for the first time in a very long time.

He drew a ragged breath before he went on, driven to speak out against her betrayal.

"I suppose you had planned to be gone by the time I returned. Your vehicle skillfully packed and boxes stacked beside the door for a clean getaway." He made a tsk-ing sound, mocking her now, as he shook his head and went on. "Once you're in the new house, deny me access by my lack of an invitation. Efficient little plan, darling." Cynicism rang in his voice. "How _unfortunate_ for you that I decided to come home early to the woman I love." _Fool that he was._

He turned and walked to their bedroom window, staring out at the still blue sky. Now that she was watching and actually listening, she noticed that his posture and the distant stare were all too familiar. A hundred times she had gone to him as he stared out a window or into the fire, wrapping arms around his waist or his neck in hopes of being a comfort. He would snap out of it, as if by some magick and the mood would shift. But it always came back. The silent stillness had become part of him somehow and Elena never understood. Until now. His words rolled through her mind, beating like a drum. _I expected this from the beginning._

"Leaving…Elijah, I'm not…"

Still turned away, he held up a single hand and she fell silent. "Please don't _lie_," He spat the hateful word at her. "I can take just about anything but that."

"I never knew the when. It was always a gamble, a roulette wheel if you will. How long will I have her?" The words and expression became pensive as he stared hard at the carpet beneath his feet. "How long before she meets some human that could give her the children I cannot?" His deep voice broke as he tried to force it out around the tightening of his throat.

_For all of his power, strength, wealth and position, he could not do this one thing that any other man could do. It made him feel broken and flawed. He was both. Longing to be all for her, in the end he was found wanting. The truth of it tore at him with sharp, jagged teeth, shredding his sanity and his prized humanity in the process._

He turned and looked into her eyes, his head still hung low. "You always wanted children. Jeremy told me that." Dark eyes that seemed to belong to a stranger became slits as they slowly moved over her.

"So now you have bought a home. You're moving to Westchester with this man." In a flash, he was nose to nose with her. "I could tell you that I wish you happy, but that would be a lie. Honestly, I hope you both rot in hell." The cultured façade was stripped away in the pain. His eyes narrowed into slits as a muscle worked in his jaw. He wanted her to be afraid. Be afraid for her lover.

_Just a name._ That was all he needed and he could turn her dreams to dust the way she had his. He could think of no better way to slake the storm inside him than with his hands as he killed the bastard, very slowly. Elijah would teach this stranger the cost of interfering with what he had waited so long for. The arrogant little insect of a man, whoever he was, should die for that alone.

Elena would hate him, but hate was more attractive now than the indifference that could have her calmly packing their life away. _When had she become indifferent? How had he missed that?_

"You go to him, Elena, and you tell him about me. _I dare you." _Dark, ferocious eyes raked her face. "You tell him everything. But don't forget to tell him that if he _ever_ hurts you- leaves you, injures you at all, I will know." He crossed his arms over his chest. "And I will have his heart for breakfast. Because I will be watching. _Always_ watching. You think of _that_ while you take your love with you. And while your children toddle at your knees. Don't doubt my words, Elena. Although you can lie and deceive me, _I will only ever tell you the truth!_" The last sentence came out savage and raw.

Fury spent, he sank onto their bed with great care as if he were a balloon that all the air had rushed out of.

Elena believed him.

And she trembled. She had not ever considered that he might hurt others to hurt her. The thought made her hands shake. But he saw and his eyes flickered like a lighting flash, giving her a moment's glimpse of the stark pain that hovered beneath the surface.

The strains of a conversation from years before played in her mind like a song. It was a discussion she had once with Stefan about what it meant to be a vampire. He had told her that they felt more deeply, everything forever amplified. The last bits of the conversation ran and she was struck by how Stefan had casually pointed out that a loss, any serious loss that might injure another person could cripple a vampire….leading even to madness.

Elena stepped slowly forward, taking his face gently in trembling hands. "I love you." He tried to pull away, negating her words with a sharp, wordless shake of his head, but she stopped him as he started to move away. Determined, despite her fear, she wrapped her arms around his neck before he could stand to his full height. They were nose to nose again, for a second before he turned his stony stare to the plush carpet.

"Please, darling, look at me." He didn't, but she rushed on anyway. "I bought that house outright as a wedding gift for Jeremy and Suzette. They decided they want to settle in Westchester. I have a friend who is an agent; yes he is a man, _but he is only my friend_. He's been waiting and ready to search for the perfect place and he found it. There have been lots of meetings, lots of viewings. I didn't tell you because you get upset when I use anything from that bank account." Disbelieving eyes met hers, filled with accusations. She already knew what he was going to say.

"Yes I know you could afford to make a gift of a home to them and never blink, but just this once I wanted to be the one giving. I should have told you and I'm sorry. I never intended to hurt you by hiding it."

"As for all this," She gestured desperately around the room at the scarred wall and the boxes on the floor, "This was me gathering things to contribute to their new home, trinkets, mother's dishes, blankets and linens- some that mom made, some her mother made. Of course they'll want new, but Jeremy might treasure some familiar things too. I needed something to do because I was restless." She waited a beat for him to meet her eyes again. She could only hope he was listening, hearing, beyond the anger. "I was restless because I _missed you_. Children be damned, Elijah. _You are all I will ever want._" The words came out sounding like a vow, because that's what they were. Was that really a surprise to him? They had left all of it unspoken because he had seemed to prefer it that way. _Or did he?_

"A child's dreams don't enter into this, and that's what Jeremy remembers….little girl dreams that have no place here, with us. And hear this right now. There. Is. No. Other. Man. -no matter what you think you know-. How could you even think I could do that to you? I will live and die loving you." Her voice went high and then broke before she finished her thought. Tears leaked out, streaking silently down her face as she spoke, her eyes wide, her sobs contained.

_How could he not know? How could he doubt? _The need to reach him, have him _truly_ hear her made her chest burn. The idea that she was losing him, over nothing, made her feel she was fighting for her life. For their life.

"You like to remind me that you can hear my heart. " She took one hand and leaned back, slapping her chest. "Put your ear right here and listen. _Tell me I'm lying._ What you'll hear is fear, because I'm afraid. Not of you, but of losing you. When I gave you my heart, I gave you all of it. There isn't any left to give anyone else." He was watching, studying her, his face softening as she spoke, but she was still afraid. "Please, hear me."

He sat back on the bed again, and she let him go. He gathered her to him and pressed his face into her sweater. She ran loving hands over his hair, just grateful to be able to touch him again.

"Oh, God, Elena." His voice splintered as he let the pain go finally in a rush, his internal storm beginning to calm. "I thought…"

"It's alright, sweetheart." All her heart in the endearment, she stroked his back rhythmically with loving hands. Tears came again, but this time with relief. "If I had been thinking what you were thinking, I probably would've just gone and done the damage you only thought about. Even now, your self-control amazes me."

"You should know that if you ever decide to send me away, I won't go. I'm just as stubborn as you are silent, dear. And I have no pride where you're concerned. I'll sit on that doorstep waiting until you change your mind. I can hardly face a day and a night without you, much less a lifetime."

She kissed his lips whispering tender words just for him.

Halting as something occurred to her, she leaned close to his ear and whispered, "You do see that this might've been easier on us both if you had just talked to me, right?"

He knew the truth of what she said. Sharing his life meant sharing all of it, something that didn't come easy for Elijah. He'd been alone for eons and vulnerability didn't come naturally. But he might've lost everything in his silence. As a male who learned from his mistakes, he let it all pour out of him, there in the safety of her arms and her love.

So, for the first time in far too long, they talked about the things that truly mattered to them both. Honestly, openly they talked about demands, promises and rights. Neither wanted power, nor sway over the other. But living in a state lacking resolution had worn on Elijah and their relationship, leaving him feeling like he was teetering in uncertainty. Elena had thought Elijah simply preferred not to make or hear promises or plans. They both saw that they had been determined to misunderstand one another.

The wedding took place six weeks later in Elijah's gardens in a quiet ceremony with friends and family looking on.

If Elijah wanted them, Elena would give him all the promises she had to give.


End file.
